Of course, to follow suit of the Batman lingo, this was a bat weird, bat film that made me question my bat sanity.

Alongside the tight leggings, there were admittedly a lot of Dicks (of course I’m referring to the yacht captain’s reading habits and Robin’s real identity, nothing more…)

But with the occasional random couple snogging, the instant outfit lever, and Catwoman’s need to randomly meow, I was often left asking, in a hazed state, “what was that?”

My best guess: a slapstick movie, made to entertain the kids and make the parents ask themselves the same questions I have… Why the eyebrows on the mask? Why the shark bat-spray? Why the tight shorts?

I can’t help but laugh at the dialogue. Like the Penguin’s facial prosthetics, it’s all a bit on the nose.

In comparison, you can’t even consider Nolan’s and Robert Pattison’s Batman as surrounding the same character. If anything, this film was closer to The Lego Batman Movie, and with nearly as much plastic in the form of giant signs and toys to make Batman’s situation as obvious as possible for its presumably young and young-at-heart audiences.

Minus the very sad (not really) off-screen death of a porpoise we never meet, and Batman’s punches that fall about a mile from his enemies’ faces, there is no real violence or emotional investment.

And with the Pentagon busy playing board games, riddles in which the answer is absurdly “banana”, and lines such as “some days you just can’t get rid of a bomb…” it’s a strange mix.

The biggest irk I had with this was the pace at which the film progresses. Now, perhaps I am not its target audience (although I’d be lying if I said I didn’t find the campness of Batman 1966 hilarious). However, I found that the stakes could have been higher (I didn’t care much for the world leaders), and the whole Kitka situation could have been condensed a bit.

The story seemed all over the place, but maybe this was the idea?

Either way, it was fun, it was light, and it was bat-shit crazy.